


Boys Suck

by Akaisha_Loire



Series: (My) Immortal: Web Series [6]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: (My) Immortal: web series, F/F, Fluff, Post Season 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-28
Updated: 2014-06-28
Packaged: 2018-02-06 12:33:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1858236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akaisha_Loire/pseuds/Akaisha_Loire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After everything was said and done Enoby considers her past failures in love and makes a decision for a future advance. A (My) Immortal: Webseries fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Boys Suck

Title: Boys Suck  
Rating: T  
Pairing: Enoby/Hermione  
Warnings: None  
Summary: After everything was said and done Enoby considers her past failures in love and makes a decision for a future advance.

Standard Disclaimer applies. I do not own Harry Potter, My Immortal or (My) Immortal: Webseries.

As requested by gloomthkin.

Boys Suck

With a plop Enoby descended upon the sofa, unceremoniously laying her head upon her best friend’s lap. “Hermione, boys are stupid,” she declared aloud.

“What did they do this time?” Hermione asked, raising her book just enough to see Enoby’s face.

“I was just thinking about past relationships. First I dated Vampire, as you remember.”

“I remember,” Hermione nodded. 

“He was so preppy when we started going out, I mean at least he was a quick learner, but not that great of a kisser. But it was fun, you know? He’s really nice and sweet and but GOTHS don’t do nice and sweet, we want drama and despair and Fifty Shades of Grey. Have you read that Hermione? What am I saying, of course you have, everyone should. Anyways, I just knew the relationship wasn’t going to work when he refused to transfigure his scar into a pentagram, it would have been so much more gothic.”

“Well, I’m pretty sure you can’t transfigure scars left by dark magic. It’s in our bodies that our magic heals about 90% of ailments that would otherwise cause trouble for muggles, but for things and ailments caused by dark magic, light magic can’t--”

Enoby raised her hand, running it over Hermione’s lips, trying to shush her. “Besides the point, anyways, it just wasn’t going to work, and then Draco came along. He just begged and begged and begged me to go out with him.”

“I’m pretty sure you asked him out.”

“But then when we were going out all he did was ask about Vampire, and while he was a MUCH better kisser he just left me to do all the work. Not only that, Draco doesn’t even OWN a flying car with a totally goth license plate that said ‘666’. And you know he wouldn’t paint his nails for me or even exchange knives. At least Vampire was most accepting of coming to the goth side and leaving the prep life behind. Draco seems more prep than I thought.”

“And the fact that he has sex with Harry kind of puts a damper on things?”

“Well, I can handle that. Being bi is so goth. Anyways, then there’s my LATEST disaster. Tom, Satan, was PERFECT, but of course he turned out more interested in Veggiemart than he was in me. I mean, I get that he wanted to get rid of all the preps, I get that, especially Britney that fucking prep. And I mean, if he got rid of Hilary Duff too I wouldn’t complain, I hate that fucking prep. So I mean, I’m just done with guys. Unless Gerard Way comes through that door I am just so done.”

“Well maybe you need to open your mind to more options? And relationships can be hard. You have to give as much as you get, I mean, look at Malfoy and Harry. Their relationship is very balanced, and they are really happy together, you could have that too.”

Enoby looked at her, thinking. “So you’re saying Vampire and Draco’s relationship works because they take turns in the bedroom and I should find a partner who can give it and take it?”

“It’s not just about the sex, Enoby, it’s about spending time together and having things in common and learning to accepting all the quirks of the person you love.”

“You’re right! With everything that’s happened in the past few days, it’s time I find someone NEW. Someone who will be completely dedicated to me!” Enoby declared, sitting up. “I’ve got it.” Leaning over, Enoby grabbed Hermione’s face, planting her lips firmly on the other girl’s. “You’re my girlfriend now, you can escort me on the next Hogsmeade trip and we can talk about MCR’s early great hits.”

Hermione blinked as Enoby left the room, muttering some kind of MCR song under her breath. “What just happened?” Hermione asked herself aloud.

-end-


End file.
